“Get that confetti ready Kansas
City!” exclaimed starting pitcher Danny Duffy. Despite being pulled from the
game in the 2nd inning, the Royals held on for the victory. Duffy
struggled out the gate by beaning the first three Japanese batters he faced in
the first inning. He got out of the bases loaded jam when the cleanup batter,
12 year-old Mitzu Bishi, pulled off his jersey waving it in an uncharacteristic
white flag of surrender.
The Royals picked up an early lead
in the second inning when the offense came alive on the heels of Jarrod Dyson.
The Royals’ speedster walked to start off the inning. He then proceeded to
steal home all the way from first base on the next pitch. Japanese pitcher Konichi
Wa exclaimed about Dyson’s speed, “He like Mario Kart on the triple mushrooms!”.
Relief pitcher Tim Collins came in
for Duffy in the 2nd inning with the Royals clinging to a 1-0 lead. The
diminutive Collins proceeded to strike out the side. The 5’ 8” Collins
attributed his success to his imposing stature on the mound in comparison to
the opposing batters.
Fast forwarding to the 5th
inning, the Royals added to their lead based on timely hitting from 3rd
basemen Mike Moustakas. Fresh off a stint in AAA Omaha, Moose credited his
newly acquired hypnotist and diet of wheatgrass drinks for his improved
approach at the plate. Moose reflected on his RBI double, “That AAA pitching
ain’t got nothin’ on the mighty Moose!”.
The Japanese team wasn’t about to
go quietly in the night though. Left fielder Nin Tendo hit a grand slam in the
6th to put Team Japan up 4-2. Royals’ lefty Bruce Chen gave up the
big fly on what he claimed was a fastball right down the pipe. The radar gun
pegged the heater at an astounding 55 mph.
Heading into the final frame, the
Royals still trailed 4-2. Designated watcher Billy Butler was the team’s
biggest cheerleader in the decisive 7th inning. Several of the
Japanese players reported seeing him downing seven Z Man’s while pausing only
to pour on more of his signature rally sauce. Covering their eyes with their
gloves, many exclaimed “Godzilla!”.
Japanese native Nori Aoki ignited
things in the 7th inning with a leadoff double down the right field
line with his signature piñata slap hit. Nori was quoted by his translator as
chanting “USA! USA!” after he came around to score on Eric Hosmer’s deep double
to left. With KC still trailing 4-3 and 2 outs in the bottom of the 7th,
Mike Sweeney stepped to the plate. The once great Royals slugger came out of
retirement mid-way through the season as the Royals’ dreadful offense was
causing him an early on-set of cataracts. Sweeney dug into the batter’s box and
proceeded to send the first pitch he saw from Japanese closer Hi Bachi over the
left field wall for a walk-off 2 run homer. The blast measured a whopping 170
feet.
As We are the Champions blared in the background, Royals players stood
around the dugout looking dumbfounded. First Base Coach Rusty Kuntz said of the
pandemonium after the game, “We all stood around looking at each other like ‘We
won. What do we do now?’. It was all just so foreign to us, the Japanese
players included”.
General Manager Dayton Moore summed
up the night best. Standing on a locker room floor covered with empty Welch’s
Sparkling Grape Juice bottles, Moore described his jubilation following the
victory over the Japanese team of pesky pre-teens: “This victory today has been
a monumental accomplishment ten years in the making. The seeds of success were
sewn when guys like Moose and Hos were still picking sunflower seeds out of
their braces. I told the fan base that the goal all along was to win a world
championship and now we’ve done that. Time for a good ole fire sale of the team
before we attempt anything crazy like a repeat.”
